It’s an interesting question and one that is a growing topic of conversation. 70% of all divorces are initiated by women, some will say that number is closer to 80%. The overwhelming reason on why? No ladies, not because their husband was unfaithful, but because they felt like they had outgrown him. Yet they still act like they need him financially like the women before the feminist movement who didn’t have the same opportunities that women have today.
Take a look around your circle of friends. Out of all of them, how many are divorced? Depending on your age there’s a good chance you have more friends that are divorced than those that are not, or have never even been married. Now take a look at who receives financial support from the divorce and who pays the financial support. Nine times out of ten the man is paying or had paid the financial support (or is ordered to, but never does) while the woman is on the receiving end of the support. Why is this?
When the first recorded divorce actually happened in the United States back in 1643 women didn’t have the same rights that they have today. In fact, prior to 1969 when Ronald Regan signed the no fault divorce bill, gender roles were more widely accepted. Women traditionally would stay at home to take care of the children and the house while the Men would work and provide the income to support the household. Regardless of how or why this changed, which I’ll save for another post, women weren’t afforded the same opportunities they have today.
Family Courts in the United States are they only court system that doesn’t truly have checks and balances in place. In Criminal Court you can request a jury of your peers to determine the outcome of your case, but in Family Court the judge has the one and only say. The Family Courts were established in a time when women didn’t have the same opportunities as they do in this modern era, so guidelines favored supporting the women as they transitioned into life without a husband who was their provider.
This way of thinking is obviously outdated, but then again so are the majority of judges that are presiding over these cases. With the rise of feminism and equality there should be a more equal outcome when it comes to divorce. But since there isn’t, and it’s apparent that the court system favors women over men, mothers over fathers, etc. based of historical precedent that hasn’t seemed to change it actually creates a system that incentivizes women to divorce.
In some states women can be paid until they remarry. I’ve met women who have been with a man for twenty-plus years that have no intention of marrying him because they would lose their income from their ex-husbands. The same is true with benefits. Some close friends of mine have been “engaged” for 30+ years but will never marry because she will lose her lifetime healthcare benefits from retiring from a large medical provider.
So what should men do knowing that the system is rigged against them? I think this is an obvious one, don’t get married. The dream of marriage and a home with a white picket fence ended a long time ago and it’s time for us to bury it. If a women you’re seeing is pushing you to get married or that she’ll leave a you, let her leave you. Trust me, you’re better off without her. If she’s not willing to understand that you assume all the risk and zero reward from marriage then she’s not the one. Most women loved the idea of marriage more than the person they are marrying. Men marry for love, women marry for utility.
If you need something more that this post, or content from other online professionals, watch a documentary called Divorce Corp. Men and women should both watch the movie and both will get a better grasp of how corrupt and irresponsible the family court systems are in the US and why it makes more sense to avoid them.
I’d love to hear your thoughts on marriage and if the the laws are set up in America in favor of women. Please leave a comment, like and share this article.
